Here's the thing: I really do want to see "War of the Worlds," which comes out this weekend, but I don't want to do anything that would be seen as supporting or putting more money in the pocket of Captain Scientology (I don't care how much he knows about psychiatry).
So what do I do?
a) Go see the movie and stop worrying so freaking much.
b) Go see the movie, and if anyone asks, tell them it's because I'm a huge Dakota Fanning fan.
c) Picket the theatre with a big sign saying Scientology is a false religion and telling Tom Cruise to repent, then sneak into the theatre right before the movie is about to start.
d) Wait until I go up to New York later on this year and buy a bootleg copy in Times Square.
e) Chill out and wait for "Fantastic Four" to come out. Jessica Alba . . . mmmm.
Speaking of whom, pageant-going homey Kristen told me over the weekend that when Tom Cruise made his first fateful contact with Katie Holmes, he'd also put in calls to the agents/publicists of Jessica Alba and Jennifer Garner asking for a meeting. (OK, he may be crazy as a shithouse rat, but his taste in chicks apparently hasn't suffered.) Garner was off filming a movie and never responded, but Alba apparently went to his house thinking he wanted to pitch her a movie or something. They talked for like an hour, and finally Alba was like, "So was there any particular reason you asked me here?", and Cruise was like "No, just wanted to meet you," and Alba was like "OK then," and left.
No real point to this story, except that when Tom talks about Katie Holmes being the love of his life, what he really means is "Door #2." There but for the grace of God (and, it would seem, some more advanced critical-thinking skills) goes Jessica Alba.
UPDATE: Someone has proposed option . . . what are we up to now in the comments threads, "(i)"? Anyway, we now have a boycott on our hands (link courtesy Double Viking).