Monday, July 2

Come back, Bill! All is forgiven!

I cannot tell a lie: I am a pimp.

Guess what! Perjury? Obstruction of justice?

Officially not all that big a deal!

We know return you to your regularly scheduled crap. In the meantime, now that I know that (when the time comes) I can lie about it without imperiling my political career, I'm gonna pull a Fredo with a couple of Asian hookers and snort coke off their asses.


Josh M. said...


Anonymous said...

Leaving aside Josh's "political point," that list makes for fascinating reading - including the pardon for an 1891 court martial for conduct unbecoming an officer. I was also struck by a pardon for an Oklahoma resident who was busted in 1964 for illegally operating a still.

Still, I can't help but notice that there wasn't anyone on the list who broke the law while covering for Al Gore's breaking of the law, while Al Gore was effectively running a shadow administration. Sort of Reagan-esque, really.

Josh M. said...

Well, I also see "Conspiracy to distribute and possess with intent to distribute crack cocaine," "Conspiracy to distribute cocaine," "Wire fraud, mail fraud, racketeering, racketeering conspiracy, criminal forfeiture, income tax evasion, and trading with Iran in violation of trade embargo" (that was a major donor's husband) - oh, and the word "perjury" appears multiple times.

My main point is that all politicians are worthless whores, and we need to figure out a way to get rid of all of them.

Robert said...

Why exactly were conservatives so fired up about pardoning Libby in the first place? Maybe I'm an idiot, but I just don't get it.

Josh M. said...

To answer that question, I give you Neal Boortz (note that I'm not saying I agree; I honestly don't care either way):

"The fact is that Libby was prosecuted following an investigation of an action that did not constitute a crime under our laws. The special prosecutor pretended to be looking for the person who had 'leaked' Valerie Plame's name to the media ... I say he 'pretended' because he knew the identity of that person from the beginning of his investigation. Patrick Fitzgerald packed the Beltway jury with people not exactly in love with George Bush, and then set Libby up as the symbol of the Bush Administration."

Anonymous said...

Josh, I was struck at the number of instances of the word "cocaine" also. And I certainly can't argue about your characterization of the parasites who orbit professional politicians.

As for Neal Boortz, what an half-wit. You don't need to "pack" a jury in DC to find people who dislike the Bush administration, since 75% of registered voters are Democrats. In fact, IIRC, in 2004 Bush only got 10% of the vote in DC, which means that he didn't even pick up all the Republican votes... So it's less a case of packing the jury and more just simple demographics.

Will said...

And yet the sentence was within Federal guidelines, which, AG AG's Department of Justice (sic) recently said should be treated as more than mere suggestion.

And Boortz has been out of the law practice too long on this...he can claim it "did not constitute a crime" yet the jury convicted Libby of something, and Bush AGREED WITH THE VERDICT, so in a legal sense even Dubya's saying Scooter broke the law. He just shouldn't, you know, actually have to serve any time (or pay the fine out of his own pocket).
And with a 28% approval rating (and I believe mid-30s at the time of the trial) where was Fitzgerald going to find 12 non-mentally deficeint folks in love with Bush?

Astronaut Mike Dexter said...

Let's also not forget that Fitzgerald was originally nominated to the position of U.S. Attorney by Republican Sen. Pete Fitzgerald, and was assigned to the Libby investigation by John Ashcroft's Republican deputy, James B. Comey. You would have to be either highly dishonest or very, very stupid to claim the Libby prosecution was a partisan anti-Bush enterprise; I'll leave it to those more familiar with Boortz to determine which one he is.

Also, would anyone care to guess who Marc Rich's lawyer was? I'll give you a hint: His initials are "Scooter Libby."

Anonymous said...

It is a sad day when Paris Hilton has more credibility than the White House.

Anonymous said...

BTW, to those that want to compare this commutation to Clinton's pardons, Susan McDogal did her time.

BulldogBry said...

From Roger Adams' testimony to the Senate Judiciary committee back in Feb 2001 (9th paragraph):

Similarly, a federal inmate seeking a presidential commutation (reduction) of his sentence files a petition for such relief with the Office of the Pardon Attorney. In contrast to a pardon, a commutation is not an act of forgiveness, but rather simply remits some portion of the punishment being served. An inmate is eligible to apply for commutation so long as he has reported to prison to begin serving his sentence and is not concurrently challenging his conviction through an appeal or other court proceeding.

If he's still appealing his conviction, how was his sentence commuted?
I don't "do" law, so did something change?

Anonymous said...

Zen Bubba has hit the nail on the head.

Can you imagine the furor if President Clinton had commuted the contempt of court sentence for Susan McDougal? We would never had heard the end of it. My God, they would have impeached him on that alone.

It's also pretty funny to hear the Repubs babble on about "no underlying crime" having been committed.

I must have missed something--were blowjobs illegal during the 1990's?

Anonymous said...

Exactly Solon, blow jobs were illegal in the 90's, as was loosing money on land deals in the 80's.

Anonymous said...

Libby's case had little to do with justice and more to do with pure politics:

Anonymous said...

I thought this whole investigation was put together to find out who "leaked" Valerie Plame's name to the press. That person was Richard Armitage. He hasn't been charged with anything. Explanations on that?

Fitzgerald needed a body...Libby was easy. Scooter should have used the Clinton defense..."I don't recall" on every question.

Anonymous said...

Josh -- "The fact is that Libby was prosecuted following an investigation of an action that did not constitute a crime under our laws"

Look, the CIA thought it was enough of a crime to press for an investigation. Then Comey approved it. If you're starting from "no underlying crime," then clearly you don't grasp the case well enough to discuss it.

Also ... your "all presidents pardon" argument is the opposite of your "drag Rudy promotes homophobia argument." In making it, you're promoting moral relativism and disrespect for the law -- which conservatives say they're against.