Monday, June 22

"OK, but seriously, do you want to know?"

Since I discussed good movies in last week's Friday Random Ten+5, it's only fair that I balance them out with a horrible one. See how far you can make it into this clip before your brain cells start to spontaneously combust:

I don't know what movie this is from, I don't even know who those two actors are, but I can hypothesize two things: 1) The screenplay for this single two-and-a-half-minute scene is probably about 20 pages long, and 2) whoever wrote it had just started taking an ESL class and had only learned a handful of English phrases. (I don't know what kind of paranoid-ass English class opens by teaching its students "Don't touch me!", but that's just the world we live in, I guess.)

Oh, and if you'll permit me to go a little Patton Oswalt on you for a second, here's 3): Someone actually produced and released this film.

Enjoy your week, mofos!


Universal Remonster said...

If it's a movie where they are both malfunctioning robots it might make sense...

Anonymous said...

Oh, my God. The first minute and a half feels like I am watching a live action Family Guy spoof with Stewie and Brian.

"I will open the door."

Maria Horton said...

That's a short list... No Airplane?

EmotionalFescue said...

"Did you see the clip Doug posted on HJS today?"

"No, I haven't seen it yet."

"Well, its this terrible..."

"I don't want to know."

"Why won't you just..."

"I don't want to know!"

"Would you calm down, its just a blog."

"Don't touch me!"


"I don't want to know!"

SilverBs said...

Obviously, whoever thought up waterboarding didn't know about this movie.

Tracer Bullet said...

I made it to 1:05, or about 349 repetitions of "Don't touch me."

Dawglicious said...

I want that 2:39 of my life back.

Unknown said...

It's still better than Contact with Jodie Foster.