Not having any friends, I get by with a little help from my blood relatives.

Maybe I should've told y'all about this earlier, but I'm heading out of town tomorrow. Way out of town. To Venice, actually. Yup, visiting family in scenic Venice, West Virginia. I actually don't know why I'm excited about it.

No, I'm going to the real Venice, and staying for about 10 days. I may have Internet (and therefore blog) access during that time, but I may not, so just in case, I'm inviting a guest blogger to come in and spell me while I'm gone. You know her as ACG from Practically Harmless; I, on the other hand, know her as Mom and Dad's favorite. (Just kidding, baby sis. Although you did get a nicer first car than me, and you got to do a semester in England, and they visited you at college a lot more than . . . well, we can discuss this another time.)

Anyway, if you've read her blog at all, you know it's actually probably smarter and better thought-out than this one, so you should have some fun with her. (If you haven't read her blog, you've committed a grave sin against my family. Go away.) Enjoy her snarking and feel free to spar with her in the comments threads just as vehemently as you do with me; she's a big girl, she can take it.

Should I decide I like Italy and my bodily tissues are so completely saturated in grappa that I just don't feel like coming home, Ann will have the option of keeping this blog as her own or auctioning it off to the highest bidder.

Anyway, I hope I'll be able to holler at you soon from the great city of Venice. And if not . . . well, you'll live.