Thursday, October 2
The debate rules.
· Every time Sarah Palin refers to herself as a "reformer," take a drink.
· Every time Joe Biden gets warned by Gwen Ifill that he's gone over his allotted response time, take a drink.
· Every time Palin mentions her special-needs child, take a drink.
· If she makes reference to "cracks in the glass ceiling" in any amount, take a drink.
· If she mentions Hillary Clinton while doing so, take two drinks.
· If Biden responds by saying, "Governor, I work with Hillary Clinton. I know Hillary Clinton. Hillary Clinton is a friend of mine. Governor, you're no Hillary Clinton," do a tequila shot in celebration.
· Every time Palin looks up, smiles, and says "You knowwww . . . " in a way that says there's an irrelevant personal story or really-stretching-it joke coming up, drink.
· If she tells that fucking story about putting the airplane on eBay, chug your drink.
· For every time she claims to have said "Thanks but no thanks" to the Bridge to Nowhere, chug someone else's drink, and if they ask what happened to their drink, say you have no idea, you don't drink.
· For every time she claims to have foreign-policy experience, take a drink.
· If she invokes Alaska's proximity to Russia in doing so, take another drink (a vodka shot, of course).
· For every time either candidate says "I agree with [opponent]," take a drink.
· If Biden slips up and calls Gov. Palin "little lady," do a shot, then shoot yourself in the head.
· For every time a pundit says Palin "held her own" in the post-debate analysis, take a drink.
· If one of those pundits says Palin "proved she's qualified to be vice-president," start drinking and don't stop until November 5.