I've taken ample opportunities to rag on the knobs from "Blogs for Bush," a bloggin' band of right-wing sycophants who have voluntarily buried their noses so far up Dubya's ass they'd need OnStar to find their way out. But earlier this week they put up something so obtuse I was literally speechless when I saw it, and y'all probably know I'm not speechless all that often. Chief knob jobs Matt Margolis and Mark Noonan have written a book called Caucus of Corruption, which, according to TBogg, purport to show how the Democrats have run amok with all that power they've been exercising as the minority in Congress for the past 12 years. If you're already snickering at the idea that the party that counted Bob Ney and Mark Foley among its ranks should be swooning over anyone else's so-called corruption, check this out:
* Who in the Democratic Party is connected to embattled lobbyist Jack Abramoff?
* How many have run afoul of campaign finance laws?
* Who are taking free trips, accepting bribes and lobbyist cash?
It's all in Caucus of Corruption!
Yes, they're blowing the lid off how the Democrats are tied to Jack Abramoff. I'll give you a moment to recover from that . . . still there? Good. Now it's time for the irony trifecta:
I'm excited to report that Caucus of Corruption has received its first endorsement! Our first endorsement comes from Rep. Tom DeLay, a great man and politician who found himself the number one target of Democrats in their phony ethics war.
We are pleased to present to you a portion of DeLay's endorsement.
"...Margolis and Noonan have cut through the smoke and mirrors to reveal what the liberals are really hiding - their complete lack of leadership and refusal to stand up for the values-based agenda most Americans are demanding. This book is a must read for all Americans looking for the unreported motivations behind the Left's political scene."
The true story has always been there, and we're pleased that we're able to tell it. Matt and I wish to thank Tom DeLay not only for his endorsement, but also for his service to our nation.
An endorsement for a book. A book about corruption. About the corruption of the Democrats' supposed ties to Jack Abramoff. And that endorsement came from Tom f'ing Delay. Kids, there's enough irony here to fill an entire Alanis Morrissette box set, and you'd still have enough left over for any number of O. Henry stories.
This is what we're up against in '06: People so separated from reality that they didn't realize how fucking asinine that is. People who consider themselves so completely above the law that their own transgressions never once crossed their minds as they posted that, or if they did, they didn't think it was that big a deal. So if you don't vote tomorrow, you're saying that you're OK with that kind of idiocy running the show in Washington. You're saying that while you could hold them accountable for all the crap they've pulled over the last decade-plus . . . ehhhh, you just don't really feel like it right now.
Are you completely OK with how things are being run in Iraq? Then vote Republican.
Are you completely OK with senators and congressmen who think they can take over and make medical decisions for your loved ones? Then vote Republican.
Are you completely OK with a $9-trillion national debt and the biggest increase in discretionary spending since the Great Depression? Then vote Republican.
Are you completely OK with the Speaker of the House remaining somebody who shields sexual predators? Then vote Republican.
Are you completely OK with your civil liberties -- not terrorists' civil liberties, yours -- being suspended until one guy in Washington decides he's bored reading your e-mails? Then vote Republican.
Otherwise . . . you know what to do. I'm not going to sit here and tell you that the Democrats are going to save the world or even that they're going to be able to snap their fingers and clean up the Republican's mounting messes overnight. But sweet Christ on a saltine, they've got to be better than this.