Thursday, January 26
And thus is trod the razor-thin margin between genius and travesty.
No, it's not the 'stache playing tricks on you -- he really is badass.
Every Day Should Be Saturday was on-the-ball enough to bring us the news of an impending big-screen adaptation of the late, great "Magnum, P.I." TV series. Orson and Stranko seem to be convinced that this is a horrible idea, and given the clockwork awfulness of most old TV shows turned into movies, I'm not about to call their fears unfounded. However, I'm willing to hold out hope for the potential awesomeness of a Magnum movie, with one caveat: The movie has to star Tom Selleck in the title role. Has to! If it does, I'm there. If not, I will not only refuse to see the movie but also organize a full-scale nationwide boycott.
My early childhood TV viewing included a steady diet of "Magnum" thanks to my mom, who thought Tom Selleck was teh hott and who also happened to, at the time, be married to a dude who bore a striking resemblance to The Selleck himself. (Small vestiges of this resemblance continued throughout his life, though Dad pretty much forfeited any claim to Selleck-ness when he got rid of his 'stache a couple years ago.) So anyway, it's hard for me not to look upon the character of Thomas Magnum, and therefore The Selleck himself, as a complete badass. Living (by all appearances) rent-free on a massive estate in Hawaii, driving a Ferrari, bedding hot chicks, solving crimes? Every red-blooded male out there, whether he's aware of it or not, strives to live that kind of life.
But my greater point is that nobody other than Selleck can do justice to this role. Various folks in the EDSBS thread suggested people like George Clooney, who is also badass, but my question is, why can't Selleck carry this movie? OK, so maybe his resume over the past few years has been mostly made-for-TV work, but this cat has charisma out the Hawaiian wazoo ("Three Men and a Baby"? That season of "Friends" where he was shagging Courtney Cox? C'mon, people!) and deserves a starring role in something like the "Magnum" movie to be to his career what, say, "Pulp Fiction" was to Travolta's.
As for the rest of the casting, I'm not sure what the producers should do and they're certainly not soliciting my opinion, but here are my thoughts based on personal preferences and what I picked up in the EDSBS thread:
Higgins: Ricky Gervais ("The Office")
T.C.: Ving Rhames ("Out of Sight")
Rick: Jeremy Piven ("Grosse Pointe Blank")
Higgins: Ben Kingsley ("Sexy Beast")
T.C.: Andre Braugher ("Get On the Bus")
Rick: Paul Giamatti ("Sideways")
Swing-for-the-fences, outside-the-box casting
Higgins: John Cleese ("Monty Python")
T.C.: Andre Patton (Big Boi of OutKast)
Rick: Zach Braff ("Scrubs")
Just my ideas, of course. But the one constant has to be The Selleck. No compromises on this one, kids. Feel free to make your own casting suggestions (and/or predictions of the movie's probable greatness/suckitude) in the comments thread.